Going with the flow… We all do it, but are we going with the right flow? With God’s flow?
My entire life has been a journey of finding my true self. My true personality, beliefs, beauty factors, flaws, own words- all of it. Over the years, I have realized that my weakness is going with the flow. It doesn’t have to be a weakness, but I made it into one. Quite a few years back, I found myself with a few friends, however I was slowly starting to transform into them. At the time, I hadn’t really reached the point of becoming a true follower of Christ, so instead of transforming into who God had made me to be, I transformed into a person that wasn’t me. I was striving to be heard and that’s where it all fell apart. I thought I had found myself, but no, I had found an unnatural side of me. I didn’t follow God’s flow for my life, I followed society’s.
Society tells you to change who you are and how you act. Sadly, I did exactly that. I did it blindly too, which I’m sure we all do. I didn’t give my actions time to process, I just did them. Honestly, the only thing I got from it was heartbreak. I tried to change myself to draw attention to my words. I put society’s flow above God’s. My friendship with them slowly faded (like a lot of friendships do) and by that, everything began to click. It was simply me not knowing where to put the friendships I had grown. From those friendships, I grew another and God revealed what needed to be known. God gave me someone to encourage and inspire me on my journey- my best friend, now boyfriend of two years. He really helped me through the whole process without even realizing it. (As badly as I want to, I won’t go into our full story right now.) He encouraged me to see the love of the Lord I had inside of me and to be who God made me to be. He encouraged me not to be anyone else, but myself. He encouraged me to reach towards God and the closer I got to God, I realized that His flow wasn’t the one that I was following. God’s flow is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (I talk a tad bit more about that here.) You’re meant to thrive on having charistics of God and the more you achieve that, the more you see who you really are. Following God’s flow turns the so-called weakness into a strength.
Here’s the bottom line:
The journey of finding God’s flow for my life has been a roller coaster and I’m still on it. We never actually get off of the roller coaster. I’m still trying to find my true self, because I’m constantly learning new things about who God is.
The main thing I want you to take from this is how getting closer to God and finding who God really is, is the way to find yourself. You don’t find yourself by imitating another human being, but imitating God. That is how you find your true self. Sometimes we may just need that little push from a true and Christ-following friend or a random stranger who has the same attributes. 😉
Sunshine in the Haze 